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My Cancer Story

Fuck Cancer

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  • This is the Story…
  • 2015
    • March 2015
      • Fuck Cancer – CaringBridge Introduction
      • So, It’s Lymphoma – March 31, 2015
    • April 2015
      • Flowers for Deb – April 2, 2015
      • Another Day, Another Biopsy – April 4, 2015
      • Quack Quack – April 8, 2015
      • New Do and a Portacath – April 10, 2015
      • Coming At You Live from Treatment Room 25! – April 13, 2015
      • Now For the Good Stuff – April 13, 2015
      • And…. We’re Done! – April 13, 2015
      • Live From Treatment Room 6 – Cycle 1, Part 2 – April 14, 2015
      • Live From Treatment Room 9! – April 15, 2015
      • Look Good Feel Better – April 15, 2015
      • Update and Wig Day – April 16, 2015
      • Wig Play – April 16, 1015
      • Relatively C-Free Weekend – April 18, 2015
      • Port Draw Day – April 21, 2015
      • Better Today April – 22, 2015
      • That Moment When “Personal Grooming” Ceases To Be An Issue – April 25, 2015
      • Today’s the Day April – 26, 2015
      • Bus Stop Baldness Reveal – April 28, 2015
    • May 2015
      • Accessorize! – May 3, 2015
      • Live from Treatment Room 9! – May 5, 2015
      • Home Again Home Again Jiggity Jig – May 5, 2015
      • Neulasta Appointment – May 7, 2015
      • Pulled an All-Nighter – May 12, 2015
      • Things of Note – May 12, 2015
      • I Remain in Custody – May 12, 2015
      • The Latest From Room 5012 – May 12, 2015
      • Some Things Can’t Be Unseen – May 12, 2015
      • Freedom!!! – May 13, 2015
      • Well, Crap! – May 13, 2015
      • Back and Forth and Still Here – May 13, 2015
      • I’m Bustin’ Out! – May 14, 2015
      • I’m Fine – May 18, 2015
      • Cheers! – May 19, 2015
      • Live From Treatment Room 21! – May 26, 2015
      • She Made It! – May 26, 2015
      • Needles, Needles Everywhere – May 27, 2015
      • Crazy Brows – May 28, 2015
      • Lashing Out – May 30, 2015
    • June 2015
      • Crash Into Me – June 1, 2015
      • And I’m Free, I’m Free Fallin’ – June 3, 2015
      • Spoke Too Soon – June 4, 2015
      • Hot Child in the Suburbs – June 5, 2015
      • PET Scan – June 11, 2015
      • PET Scan Results – June 12, 2015
      • Live From Treatment Room 19 – June 15, 2015
      • Round 4, continued – June 15, 2015
      • Needledeedledee – June 16, 2015
      • Blech Day – June 17, 2015
      • Bump in the Road – June 18, 2015
      • Waiting for Godot – June 18, 2015
      • Homeward Bound – June 18, 2015
      • R&R – June 19, 2015
      • Deb and The Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day – June 23, 2015
      • Chillin’ – Retro Style – June 24, 2015
      • Housekeeping – June 24, 2015
      • Housekeeping – June 24, 2015
      • Chillin’ – Retro Style – June 24, 2015
      • Deb and The Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day – June 23, 2015
      • Mail Bag – June 25, 2015
      • Zzzzzzzz – June 29, 2015
      • Closer to Fine – June 27, 2015
    • July 2015
      • Doesn’t it Figure? July 6, 2015
      • Live from treatment room 6! – July 7, 2015
      • Back Home – July 7, 2015
      • Good Day So Far – July 8, 2015
      • Great Day – July 8, 2015
      • Polar Opposite – July 9, 2015
      • Tasteless – July 10, 2015
      • Owie – July 11, 2015
      • A Horse of a Different Color – July 13, 2015
      • Adventures in Neutropenia – July 14, 2015
      • Fire-Free – July 14, 2015
      • Chillin’ – July 15, 2015
      • False Advertising – July 16, 2015
      • Chemo Head as Art – July 25, 2015
      • Live from Treatment Room 16 – July 27, 2015
      • L’Chiam! – July 27, 2015
      • Thoughts On My Last Treatment Day – July 28, 2015
      • Fuckity Fuck Fuck – July 30, 2015
      • A Bit Better – July 31, 2015
      • My Haunted Leg – July 31, 2015
    • August 2015
      • Fire Watch – August 2, 2015
      • Yep – August 2, 2015
      • Definite Incineration – August 3, 2015
      • Prisoner – August 3, 2015
      • Incineration Continues – August 4, 2015
      • Sunset, Day 2 – August 4, 2015
      • On Hair – August 4, 2015
      • Going…. Going… – August 5, 2015
      • Gone! – August 5, 2015
      • Back in the Saddle Again! – August 18, 2015
      • Live From the Nuclear Dungeon – August 20, 2015
      • Better Images – August 27, 2015
      • CANCER FREE(ish?) – August 24, 2015
    • September 2015
      • Ow! – September 2, 2015
      • Po’ Hawk – September 11, 2015
      • No Hawk – September 15, 2015
      • Can’t Do Math – September 15, 2015
      • Definite Progress – September 19, 2015
      • Step by Step – September 24, 2015
      • Not Totally Random – September 20, 2015
    • October 2015
      • Lashes! – October 1, 2015
      • Live from Sbux – October 7, 2015
      • Lumps & Bumps – October 20, 2015
      • The C-Word – October 27, 2015
    • November 2015
      • Hair! – November 10, 2015
      • Here Piggy Piggy – November 21, 2015
      • HaaallelUjah! HaaallelUjah! HallelUjah! HallelUjah! HalleeeluuujAH! – November 24, 2015
    • December 2015
      • Endings, Beginnings, and Mergings – December 13, 2015
      • Deported! – Dec 14, 2015
      • Season’s Greetings, Urinator Update, and More – Dec 23, 2015
      • First Haircut! – Dec 30, 2015
  • 2016
    • One Year Later… – Feb 19, 2016
    • Another Follow Up Visit with Alla – March 6, 2016
    • Meow Scan – May 31, 2016
    • Rockstar and Red Beans – Sep 11, 2016
    • Housekeeping – Nov 5, 2016
    • One Helluva Week (and a Half) – Dec 16, 2016
    • Checkup Time! – Mar 14, 2017
  • 2017
    • Clearing My Plate – Dec 15, 2017
    • Checkup: Check! – Aug 29, 2017
  • Epilogue – 2020
  • Other Stuff
    • BiselBlog
    • Deb Moran Photography
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Epilogue – Jul 15, 2020

I have no idea the last time I posted a cancer post. It’s been a minute. I haven’t bothered posting about my checkups in the last few years (unless it was incidental to some other post), which I faithfully attended every six months. Here’s how the visit would typically go…

Park the car and enter the building. Check in at the front desk. Wait for my turn with Nizi, who does all of the non-port blood draws. Have a pleasant chat while she does her thing. Return to the waiting room. Hear Lisa call my name. Follow her back for vitals. Talk about our latest dietary and exercise efforts. Follow her to the exam room and wait for Alla. Smile when I hear the click-clack of her heels. Big smiles and hugs. Bloodwork is perfect (they have their own lab, so results come in minutes, not days). Talk about kids, camp (ours go to the same overnight camp), other various topics. Hug goodbye. Repeat in six months.

Note: I never did need another scan. Alla told me that they (“they” being the all-knowing collective of experts), have found if a patient were to relapse, they almost always came in with symptoms before it was ever caught on a scan, so to all that extra radiation we said, “Bye Felicia!”

Even though the anniversary of my last chemo treatment isn’t until the 27th, on Monday, I had my 5 year visit with Alla. FIVE YEARS! It’s so surreal. Like graduation. But this is better than any graduation. This is CURED of cancer! Could something else cause another cancer down the road for me? Sure it could. Do I still need to be cognizant of the potential long term complications from chemo? Of course. But after Monday, I will never have another appointment related to the Diffuse Large B Cell Lymphoma that turned life upside down at the end of 2014. In case you’re new to this story, you should probably start with this post.

Oddly, it all feels a bit unfinished. Thanks to the current need to socially distance, there was no hug hello. Smiles were there, but barely perceptible, because they were hidden behind masks. We chatted as we normally would, but we were on opposite sides of the room. We talked about our kids, but not as much as usual. We talked LOT about COVID-19, the fact that even this far out from chemo, I’m still at higher risk for complications if I did get the ‘Rona. So yeeeeah, I have to go ahead and be extra careful. Meaning, I shouldn’t do things like get on airplanes or go to the gym – at least until we get a better handle on this thing, understand it more, have reliable treatments and/or an effective vaccine. Kinda sucks, but not as much as having cancer did, so there’s that.

I asked her if I needed to make another appointment. She said, “Well, if you really want to. You can come back once a year.” As we’d discussed in the past, lots of patients have a difficult time letting go of the worry. They want an annual visit just “to make sure.” And I get that. I really do. But, I’m more than happy to end this chapter of my life.  Still, I will miss Alla. I’ve been fortunate to find several amazing doctors who get me, and I get them. We’d be friends in any other situation. Oooh! I wonder if Alla would want to meet for coffee once in a while, seeing as I’m no longer her patient. Or would she find that weird?

Anywhoodle, that evening, Hubs and I decided to celebrate. We broke out the wedding flutes and chose a bottle of 2014 Paradise Ridge sparkling blanc de blanc from our last Napa trip. He patiently helped me set up the shot and get the lighting just right. Then, we toasted this milestone and to health (mine in particular – natch).

Celebrating 5 years cancer-free!

L’chiam, sláinte, and FUCK CANCER!

 

1 thought on “Epilogue – Jul 15, 2020”

  1. Suzy R says:
    July 19, 2020 at 3:36 pm

    Love this!

    Reply

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